


Stand Tall

by af109



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:28:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27091288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/af109/pseuds/af109
Summary: Charlotte lost a lot the night the band died she lost both her brother and the man she thought was the love of her life. Since then she has struggled with addiction slowly losing the battle. She hates the type of mother she became to her daughter, she hates herself and begins to wonder if it's even worth fighting anymore. When she feels like giving up she hears a song playing and when she sees who is preforming she realizes that there is still a fight worth fighting.
Relationships: Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Luke Patterson (Julie and The Phantoms)/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 53





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure if anyone can follow this. I had a horseback riding accident a few days ago and hit my head pretty hard. I’ve been stuck sitting around the house for days and just re watching this show over and over and this idea came to me. If I end up going back to read this later and see it only makes sense to concussed me I'll delete this.

Charlotte didn’t really want to be in this bar or any bar really. She had come back here to try and reconnect with her daughter. She wanted to apologize to her daughter and also to her ex-husband for everything she had put them through. She became the type of mom she never wanted to be; she became her own mother which horrified her. Luckily her daughter had a better father then she had. Addiction had taken over her life it was something she had battled with in her teenage years, but after _that_ night she allowed it to win the war within her. She thought of the few times she had tried to fight her addiction, mainly right at the start she had a support system of her brother and the band, but when her brother died when a majority of the band died, she was alone with Bobby who also had been battling addiction. The two of them allowed that night to be an excuse to lose themselves in drugs, Bobby pulled himself out and no matter how many times he tried to pull her up he never succeeded for very long. Many times, she ended up dragging him back down. That was until they found out she was pregnant for a time it had been enough to keep them both sober. Bobby, who had gotten famous off of Luke’s songs had stopped the partying, bought a house and asked her to marry him. It seemed like a good idea at the time and they did live as a family for a small amount of time, but she had suffered from post-partum that made it all too easy to slip back into her old ways. In the past Bobby who had decided to go by his middle name Trever always made excused for her, but when he came home from recording and found her passed out lying on the ground in her own vomit with Carrie crying in the high chair still with her breakfast food scattered around he had told her it was get help or get out. She left. She came back every so often when she pulled herself together, they always let her back into their lives, Trever always seemed to have open arms when welcoming her back, as the years went by Carrie got more and more distant. Charlotte couldn’t blame her she knew what it was like to have a mother that picked drugs over her own child, she had hated her own mother for it, so she didn’t blame Carrie for never returning her calls.

She had been sober now over a year the longest she had been sober since she was a teenager. She had tried calling, but Carrie never called back, she had tried writing, but Carrie never wrote back. So she decided come back here, she hated it here, everywhere she went in this town she was reminded of her brother, she was reminded of Luke, the boy she had thought she would marry one day.

She had planned to go right to her family’s house, but somehow, she found herself in front of the Orpheum and her eyes found the ally that they had all died in and now somehow, she was here, in a bar just down the road. She never made it to Carrie her eyes staring at the drink as she found the impulse to drink it and keep on drinking. Alcohol was the gateway for her, it would lead to pills and she would lose herself again. The more she thought about the drink the more she kept finding herself convincing herself that she should just drink, just allow herself to stop with the guilt of leaving her daughter, the pain of losing those important to her.

She thought about growing up with her twin brother. Everyone always seemed to think he was an idiot at times especially their parents, but he had always protected her. When their parents started screaming, he always came to her room pretending he was scared, but he never was, he knew she was terrified. He would crawl into her bed and hold singing to her until she fell asleep with Reggie next to her, she would be able to sleep. When their father got too drunk, he would barricade the door so he couldn’t get in. It was easy to fall into the same patterns of their parents. They often would wake up to their parents passed out from drugs and drinking with the vices laying around the apartment, but Reggie never was tempted, he said those things blocked the music from him. He was always so much stronger than anyone in their family. She wasn’t as strong as him, as they entered high school, she was already developing a problem, she would give Reggie a hard time about not drinking, not taking a little pill here or there. If Reggie saw her with pills or drinks, he would take them and flush it. Things were rocky for a while between them. She couldn’t remember the night very well, but she did have a few memories from the night he was finally kicked out of their home. He got in a fight with their parents because their drug dealer had her in his lap and was kissing her, touching her, she was only sixteen at the time. She had been so high she didn’t see a problem with it, but Reggie did. She had never seen Reggie lose his temper, that night Reggie threw the first punch, that night their father nearly killed him. She remembered screaming she remembered crying, but she didn’t remember what happened after that. She woke up the next morning sleeping on a couch she didn’t know in a garage she didn’t know with a boy looking at her.

“Hi.” He said a grin pulling at his lips, “I’m Luke.” She knew Luke from school he was one of Reggie’s friends, but she hadn’t hung out with him or Reggie she hardly even went to school anymore and when she did, she hung out with other kids like herself, kids who weren’t sober at most of the time.

“I know who you are.” She brought her hand to her head it was pounding.

“Here.” He said handing her water

She glanced at him, “The best way to deal with this is to not sober up.”

“No.” Luke still smirked, “The best thing to do is get some water into you, and maybe some greasy food.”

She wanted to argue with him, but the few memories from the night before came to her mind, Reggie bleeding. “Reggie!” she said sitting up quickly.

“He’s fine.” Luke frowned for a moment, “Well he’s a little banged up, but Alex dragged him to urgent care just to make sure, I told him I’d watch you.”

She moved her legs over the side of the couch and noticed she was hardly wearing anything, mainly an oversized shirt, “Sunset Curve?” she asked the name sounded familiar, but she didn’t know why.

“Wow.” Luke shook his head, “You really have been on drugs a bit, haven’t you?”

“Excuse me?” she asked insulted, even if he spoke the truth. She did drugs to have fun she wasn’t an addict like her parents.

“It’s our band.” He told her, “Your brother’s band.”

She thought back to what Reggie had said, maybe she had heard him talk about his friends starting a band, but the more she thought about it she and Reggie had really started to drift apart. “You made shirts?” she asked as stood up and stretched.

Luke allowed his eyes to glance at her bare legs for a moment,

“You’re up!” Reggie’s voice sounded relieved from the doorway. She noticed Luke quickly turn away from her and speak almost sounding nervous,

“She uh just woke up.” He glanced at the cup of water, “I gave her water.”

“Thanks Luke.” Reggie said giving him a smile.

Charlotte saw the bruises on her brother’s face, the cuts and the spot near his hairline that still had some dried blood in it. “Reggie.” Tears filled her eyes, “What did he do to you?”

Reggie moved forward and hugged her, “It’s fine.” He told her, “We’re fine.”

Charlotte hated when memories came back to her, she remembered how much she loved her brother and how much he loved her. He got in a fight with her father when he was never a fighter, all for her. He pulled her out of that house and didn’t give her much of a choice to stay with him and the band. Luke had a fight with his parents and stayed at the garage, Alex’s family didn’t seem to care where he was ever since he came out, back then she had wanted to stay with her brother. She wanted to be the girl Reggie saw and not the girl she really was. She came to realize back then she was addicted like her parents, it had moved past having fun to a true addiction but being around her brother’s band had inspired her to be better. She learned how talented they really were their music made her want to be the best version of herself.

Again her eyes looked at the drink that she ordered, it wouldn’t be hard to bring the drink to her lips, after all Carrie didn’t even know she was in town yet, if she slipped again Trever and Carrie would never know they never seemed to think she would stay sober for long. Her fingers closed around the drink and she lifted it, she had nothing to lose, but before she opened her lips to allow the drink in, she saw an image of Reggie frowning in her mind, and of Luke shaking his head.

They would be so disappointed in her if they had seen what she did with her life. She let her addiction win, she wasn’t strong like them, she wasn’t strong like they believed her to be. Other memories filled her mind. She didn’t just think of time she spent listening to the band or hanging out with Reggie. Luke also filled many of her memories. She couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment she realized she had loved him; it had been slow them becoming friends. He made it very clear he didn’t approve of drugs and in the beginning, she had thought he looked down on her, but over time she just realized Luke had high standards for whoever was in his life. Over time his standards pushed her to be the best version of herself because she wanted him to see her. He had, having Luke by her side kept her sober, whenever she thought about using again, she knew she would lose Luke. Reggie would be disappointed in her, but he would always forgive her. Her and Luke moved from friendship to more, she worried Reggie would be upset, but he seemed happy for them he liked that she was with someone he deemed a good guy. That year they all had together was the strongest she ever felt. Back then she really believed she would be sober; she would marry Luke and the band would make it big. After all, how could they not they were talented. One night changed all of that.

She hated thinking of that night because she blamed herself. She slipped that night, one drink had led to another with a few of her old friends who she had bumped into and she showed up right before their sound check she was tipsy when she stumbled over to Luke and threw herself onto him in front of the pretty waitress cleaning tables and kissed him to show he was taken. Luke hadn’t been happy to see she was drunk he got really upset when she popped a pill right in front of him with the encouragement of the people who she had been hanging out with. They fought that night she remembered that much but her memories got hazy once the pill took hold of her. She knew Luke had taken her outside before Reggie could see and called her a cab, he told her to go back to the garage and then he went back into the Orpheum to do his sound check. The last image she had of Luke was a look of disappointment as he looked over his shoulder before the cab moved away from the curb and he went back into the building. 

She woke up the next morning to Bobby sitting on the chair she had once seen Luke in when she woke up hung over. The look on his face told her something bad had happened, but she never would have guessed that her brother, Luke, and Alex had died. It crushed her and she blamed herself. Whenever she was with them, she never let them get street dogs, they would have eaten something else, they wouldn’t have died they would have played their show and become famous.

Her hand had brought the drink back down to the bar while she was thinking of that night, but her hand was still closed around the glass. There was no point in fighting her addiction, if she couldn’t do it back then when she had the band rooting for her, what strength did she have now? She was already a disappointment of a mother she had become her own mother, and nothing could change that now. She hurt Carrie, she had hurt Trever and even if she had never really been in love with him, she did love him. They had been through a lot together, they had a daughter, but she hadn’t been able to stay sober for them. There really was no point to staying sober now.

 _“Welcome to live at the Orpheum.”_ Someone said from the television behind the bar, her eyes snapped up away from the drink and to the show. _“Now give it up for Julie and The Phantoms.”_

Charlotte saw a girl walk onto stage, she looked about the age her brother and his band had been. She noticed the girl looked a little nervous as she took the mike. _“Hi, I’m Julie, um tonight I’d like to dedicate this song to my mom whose been there with me every time I’ve played and thank her for not giving up on me.”_ The girl paused and Charlotte couldn’t help but think of Reggie who never gave up on her, who dragged her out of their parents’ house hoping to save her from the life of addiction. _“I’d also like to dedicate this performance to three special friends who have changed my life completely who have brought music back to me, it was their dream to play here. This is for them.”_ Alex’s smile came to her mind, Reggie’s laugh and Luke’s sideways grin, it had been their dream to play there too. _“This song is for anyone who has lost their way.”_ The girl spoke and Charlotte almost felt like she was speaking to her, _“Step into your greatness, don’t give up.”_ Her words sounded so much like words Luke would have spoken years ago. _“Stand tall.”_ The girl said as she put her microphone back on the stand and slowly, nervously began to play.

Charlotte saw the pain in the girl’s eyes as she began to sing and again, she wanted to drink,

 _“Don’t blink one thing and it’s back to the beginning.”_

The girl sang and Charlotte thought back to the garage to the boys laugh,

_“Cause everything is rushing fast, keep going on and never look back.”_

It was easy for a child of sixteen maybe seventeen to think that way, that standing tall just meant standing on stage and singing.

_“It’s one, two, three, four times that I try for one more night, light a fire in my eyes.”_

She remembered sitting with her brother once and talking about addiction, she had promised him she was never going to use or drink again. He had put his arm around her and said that even if she stumbled one, two, times, three times, or even four he would always be there to light the fire in her again to kick start going clean.

_“I’m going out of my mind. Whatever happens even if I’m the last standing, I’mma stand tall, I’mma stand tall, whatever happens even when everything’s down. I’mma stand tall, I’mma stand tall”_

It was so easy for a kid to think this way, back then she had thought that she could really fight this addiction that she could be strong, but it was so much harder to stand tall then this girl’s song made it seem.

_“I gotta keep on dreaming cause you gotta catch that feeling whatever happens even if I’m the last standing I’mma stand tall.”_

She looked away from the screen she didn’t want to listen to this girl singing about fighting, she didn’t want to fight she wanted to down the drink in front of her. She didn’t care the music picked up she didn’t care that people in the bar all seemed to be enjoying the music.

_“Right now I’m loving every minute. Hands down can’t let myself forget, no ‘cause everything is rushing in fast. Keep holding on never look back.”_

Charlotte couldn’t bring herself to face her past, it was easier to lose herself, it was easier to just be the failure then try to stay sober, when she was drunk or high she didn’t think of them that much, she didn’t think of how much she had screwed up in her life.

 _“And it’s one, two, three, four times that I’ll try for one more night light a fire in my eyes_!”

She brought the drink up again and this time she parted her lips,

 _“I’m going out of my mind!”_ A male voice sang on screen that caused her to freeze before she drank. _“What ever happen even if I’m the last standing.”_

Her eyes snapped to the screen and there he was standing on stage with the girl. Luke. The girl danced over to him as he continued to sing the camera zooming in on them.

_“Whatever happens even when everything’s down I’mma stand tall I’mma stand tall.”_

In that moment something she hadn’t felt in a long time seemed to wake up inside of her. The feeling she got whenever she knew that they boys had her back, whenever she knew no matter how bad she messed up they might be mad, but they would be there for her. She heard it before she saw him, she heard the bass and knew who the camera would zoom in on next. Standing next to the girl was Reggie. The girl and her brother danced down the stage together, Reggie sang the harmony with her and then the music got quiet and the camera focused in on the drummer on Alex as he stopped drumming and grabbed his mike.

_“Whatever happens even if I’m the last standing. I’mma stand I’mma stand tall.”_

The camera moved and she felt like her heart stopped beating for a moment as her brother’s voice came to her ears. The voice of the boy who sang her to sleep when she was little,

_“Whatever happens even if I’m the last standing. I’mma stand tall!”_

Reggie. Her brother was singing on stage at the Orpheum right now looking just like he had the night he died. She watched the joy of the girl and her band on the screen and let the glass fall to the bar and tip over spilling. People jumped out of the way, but she didn’t notice she turned and ran from the bar. She had to get to the Orpheum she had to see them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I continue this. I’ve written another similar to this, but the girl is Alex’s sister and isn’t Carrie’s mom but haven’t posted it going for this one instead. I might post the other story later but it’s pretty similar to this one let me know if you want to read it. Also Let me know if you think I should continue this one. 


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still a work in progress. I'm thinking I'm going to do some flashbacks to before the boys died to give you guys the back story to Charlotte and the guys.

Charlotte sat on her bed hugging her stuffed horse close to her trying to keep tears from falling. Her parents were fighting again and since they had been drinking, she could hear things breaking as they fought. She was scared but hated to admit it she was ten and didn’t want to be seen as a baby. She held her breath as she heard someone at the door and saw the knob begin to turn. She sighed in relief when Reggie quickly slid into the room and hurried over to her.

“Charlie, I’m scared.” He told her, but Charlotte knew that wasn’t true nothing seemed to scare him, but he knew she was scared, and he knew she wouldn’t admit it.

“You can sleep here if you want.” She told him trying to keep her voice from shaking. Reggie smiled as he crawled onto her bed.

“Thanks.” He said as he took the spot closest to the door and gave her the side next to the wall. He always did that put himself between her and anything he saw as dangerous. She smiled as she laid down face to face with her brother.

“Do you think they will ever stop?” she asked him.

Reggie’s eyes scanned her face for a moment before speaking, “Not unless they get sober.” He finally said.

“Do you think they will ever do that?”

Again, Reggie seemed to think for a moment, “No.” he said softly, “I don’t think they will.” He rolled over and looked at the ceiling. “They don’t have anything more important in their lives then the drinking and drugs.”

“Will we end up like them?” she asked, “Grandma and Grandpa are like them too.”

“No.” Reggie told her, “We will break the cycle.” He smiled at the ceiling, “I doubt they can hear the music the way they are.”

She smiled Reggie was so passionate about music he said he could hear it all around him. He was always singing or playing his instrument even if he couldn’t turn on the amp when his parents were home. Music seemed to be his escape from this place, an escape from their parents.

“Plus, we have each other.” He continued, “To make sure we don’t fall down the wrong path.”

Charlotte smiled again as she closed her eyes feeling safe enough to sleep, but a crash against the door and glass shattering made her eyes snap back open. “Reggie.” She franticly whispered.

“It’s ok close your eyes.” He told her and then he began to sing softly to her, just enough so she could focus on his voice and drown out the sounds of their parents so she could fall asleep.

* * *

Charlotte couldn’t get anywhere near the Orpheum the crowds around the building as everyone left seemed impossible to break through. She could hear people talking more about the opening act then the main band that had played, but the more she thought about it she kept telling herself what she had seen wasn’t real. She had to see the boys with her own eyes, she had to see that it was really them. She knew she was sober, but at this moment she didn’t feel sober. Perhaps she had truly broke down and now was running to the club where her brother died because she imagined seeing him on stage. She stopped pushing through the crowd, that had to be it. She shook her head, there was no way her brother could have been on that stage looking just like he had twenty-five years ago when he died. There was no way she saw Luke singing with that grin on his face, or Alex playing the drums. Perhaps the boys on stage just were similar to her boys and she was in a true mental break down and had convinced herself it was them. She turned around shaking her head she shouldn’t be here.

“Mom?” a voice broke through the crowd. She looked up to see Carrie walking through the crowd towards her, “What are you doing here?”

“I uh.” She couldn’t tell her daughter she thought she saw her uncle who she never spoke about and the rest of her father’s old band playing on stage. “Just got into town.”

“Oh.” Carrie said crossing her arms. Trever followed her looking lost, he didn’t even seem to notice her until he bumped into Carrie, “Dad!” Carrie glared at her father, “Mom is here.”

“What?” Trever shook off the lost look on his face. “Charlotte.” He stepped closer to her, “What are you doing here?”

“I uh was-” she didn’t want to tell him she was at a bar, “I came to see you two.” She couldn’t tell him she thought she had seen the band.

“Did you see the show?” he asked

“No. I wasn’t inside.”

“Good.” He sighed looking relieved

“Good?”

“I just mean that it’s the Orpheum I Know how you feel about it” he then gestured to a limo, “Why don’t you come home with us.”

Carrie let out an annoyed sigh and rolled her eyes as she stomped to the car.

“I’m sober.” Charlotte told Trever.

He smiled and nodded his head, “I know I can always tell when you are and when you’re not.”

* * *

Reggie sat outside of what used to be his house. It was a relief getting the stamp off his arm, but he didn’t feel that relief right now. He kept thinking of his family. He never forgave his parents for what they allowed to happen to his sister even if his sister had been fine with it. She was sixteen they were her parents and should have never let their drug dealer anywhere near her, but they did just about anything for drugs, would allow just about anything for their fix. He couldn’t help but wonder if they cared when he died. He saw the way Luke’s parents still had cake on his birthday and he knew that was hard for Luke, but he doubted his parents even knew when his birthday was. The person he worried about was his sister. His twin sister. She had fallen down the path of their parents when she was sixteen. She fell in with the wrong crowd he had been so focused on his music and the band he didn’t make sure he kept her on the right path. It wasn’t until the night he went back to the house just to grab some clothing before heading back to the garage where he spent most of his nights and he saw his sister sitting in his parent’s drug dealers lap. That night he lost his temper, that night he got in a fight with the drug dealer and his parents. That night he wondered if he would have died from them beating him if Luke and Alex hadn’t been waiting outside to back him up and help him drag his sister out of the house.

He hadn’t realized how bad his sister had gotten. She enjoyed drinking too much and was hooked on drugs. He felt guilty for losing himself in the band and not being there for her, but together with the other guys in the band they were able to get her clean. Her and Luke had even started dating. He didn’t mind them together because he knew when he couldn’t make sure his sister was on the right path Luke would be watching out for her. He could see the struggle his sister went through addiction was difficult and she was tempted many times. There were a few times she slipped up but overall, she kept on fighting. He knew the night they died she had bumped into old friends who weren’t clean, he knew Luke noticed and put her in a cab and sent her back to the garage to try and protect him and their show. The last he saw of his sister was her stumbling into Luke drunk and high, mad at him for talking to the girl who had watched them do their sound check. He saw Luke holding her up because she hardly could walk straight. He knew Luke was getting her a cab, he had wanted to leave and go home with her, but he couldn’t let the band down. He just wouldn’t stay for any after party, they would play their dream gig and then he would get a cab and go to the garage to make sure she was alright. Perhaps that was selfish to want to stay and preform, but in that moment, he was annoyed with his sister. She had known how important this night was to him, Luke, and the rest of the band so he told himself it was alright to not run to her side. The last memory he had of his sister, was being angry with her and he felt guilty for that.

“Hey.” Luke’s voice interrupted his thoughts, “Thought you’d be here.”

“I was just wondering where they are.” He told him, “Where she is.” Reggie said softly, “Tonight we did our dream show just like we were supposed to that night. I couldn’t help but think she should have been here.”

“I’m sorry.” Reggie said softly.

“Why are you sorry?” Luke asked

“Because she got high that night.” Reggie told him

“You knew?” Luke looked at him shocked.

“Yeah I saw her stumble into you. I saw her get mad at you for talking to that girl. I knew.” He sighed, “I was planning on leaving right after the show and go to the garage.” He paused, “Sometimes I wish that I had left when you sent her home.” He said softly, “I mean I love you and Alex, I’m happy we have this band, but I feel like I left her abandoned her. With her addiction what happened to her? You weren’t there, I wasn’t there. Who looked out for her?” tears filled Reggie’s eyes.

“I know.” Luke put his arm around Reggie, “I feel the same way sometimes.”

* * *

Charlotte was in Trever’s guest room sitting on the small couch near the window looking outside at the grounds. Her mind was on the boys and their dreams. This house was everything they had ever dreamed of having. When they were younger Reggie had always told her, he would buy a big house one day that they would live in and be free of their parents forever. She didn’t want to think about everyone and everything she lost. Every time she thought of them, she thought of their eyes of Reggie and Luke and knew they would be so disappointed in her now.

“How long?” a Carrie’s voice said from the doorway.

Charlotte looked up to see Carrie leaning on the door frame her arms crossed and a frown on her face.

“How long for what?”

“How long have you been sober? How long will it last this time?” Carrie seemed annoyed to have to clarify her question.

“A year.” Charlotte told her, “I plan on staying clean for real this time.”

“Sure.” Carrie didn’t believe her. Time and time again she had allowed her mother to come back into her life, she believed her mother really did want to be in her life, but every time her mother failed. Every time her mother fell back into her old habits.

“This time I mean if baby.” She told her. She thought of earlier in the night, when she had thought she saw the boys singing with Julie. She knew now there was no way it had really been her boys, but what it could have been was a sign. Just when she was about to undo a year of being sober, she had seen them as if they were looking down to her and begging her to stand up, to stand tall and keep fighting. “I’ve never told you about your uncle, have I?” she asked

“Uncle?” Carrie asked.

“My brother, I had a twin.”

“Was he a drug addict like you?” Carrie snapped, “And overdosed or something?”

“No.” Charlotte said a little to hash which caused Carrie to jump and frown. “Reggie wasn’t like that; he wasn’t like me or grandma and grandpa.” She smiled as she thought of her brother, even from a young age he hated drugs. “Reggie saw what it did to our parents, and he knew that wasn’t the life he wanted. He was built of stronger stuff.”

“You said had.” Carrie seemed to want to know about her uncle. Charlotte could tell Carrie was mad at her, but there had to be a reason she came here to her room.

“He died twenty-five years ago.” She told her daughter, “It was actually because of him I met your father. When they were sixteen, they created a band together.”

“Dad was in a band?” Carrie asked stepping into the room and sitting on the bed.

“Yes.” Charlotte told her, “Sunset Curve. Reggie, Luke, Alex, and your father. They really were something special, I wish we still had their demo laying around. When they played the music seemed to reach right into my soul.”

“Why did you guys never talk about them?” Carrie was curious, her mother never talked about the past. Whenever she came back, she always talked about making a better future, always said the past was the past why worry about it.

“It’s hard.” Charlotte told her, “The night they died I lost my family, your father lost his.” She thought about the boys and the weird little family they had all become. “I lost Reggie, my brother who always looked out for me and Luke, he was the man I thought I was going to marry.”

“Really?” Carrie asked, “I would think you would have been dating dad.”

“No, we didn’t become a thing until after. We only had each other, and our loss brought us together.”

“Knock Knock.” Trever said from the doorway, “What are my two favorite girls talking about?”

“Your old band.” Carrie told him, “I never knew you were in a band!”

“Hmm.” Trever glanced over at Charlotte and frowned before looking back at his daughter, “It was a long time ago.” He paused. “Do you mind leaving mom and I alone for a little bit to talk.”

Carrie rolled her eyes, “Fine whatever.” And left the room.

Trever came in and closed the door, “Why are you talking about them?” he asked, “After all these years tonight. Why tonight?”

“I-” she paused, “I’ve been sober for a year now the longest I have been in a long time. I almost slipped up tonight. I almost drank.” She thought about how close she had come; she had the drink to her lips. Tears filled her eyes, “I thought I saw them.” She shook her head, “I know I didn’t but maybe it was Reggie and Luke’s way of telling me to keep fighting the way they used to.”

Trever scanned her face, “Were you at the Orpheum tonight?” he asked.

“No, down the street at the bar.” Charlotte told him, “I know I shouldn’t have been there, but I didn’t drink I promise. I stood tall.”

Trever let out a sigh of relief, he wasn’t sure what he had seen tonight, but if she had seen what he thought he had she would be driven right back to drink. Charlotte was fragile he tried time and time again to help her get sober, but he was never able to pull her up the way Reggie and Luke had. He had hoped having Carrie would help her, but it only seemed to make her worse, make her feel more guilty for not being good enough. He hoped this time would be different that maybe this time she would be able to stay sober.

* * *

“What’s up with Reggie?” Julie asked as she sat down next to Luke. It had been a few weeks after the Orpheum and lately Reggie just didn’t seem like he was feeling it. After a song hadn’t turned out the way they wanted Reggie had muttered something and poofed out. 

“He’s been thinking of his family lately.” Alex told her

“I thought he didn’t get along with his family that well.” Julie asked.

“His parents yes.” Luke told her, “But he had a sister.”

“A twin sister.” Alex added

“What?” Julie sat up, “Really?”

“Yeah and he doesn’t know what happened to her.” Alex glanced over at Luke “She was falling down the path of their parents, drinking and taking pills.”

“The night we died she got drunk and high before the show.” Luke wasn’t looking at anyone just looking at his own hands as he strummed a few cords on his guitar. “It was hard on him. After everything he did for her, on the one night that was important to him she chose to drink and get high.”

“Luke.” Alex said softly

“She chose getting high over being there for him.” He stood up and put his guitar down. “After everything-” he paused, “I’m going to go find Reggie.” And then he poofed out as well.

“What was that about?” Julie asked Alex frowning.

“Uh.” He sighed not really sure if it was his place to say, “Luke and Charlie were dating when we died.”

“oh.” Julie hadn’t even thought of that, that they could have been dating someone when they died. “I didn’t know.”

Alex shrugged his shoulders, “How could you?” he sighed, “She broke his heart that night, both of their hearts. She chose getting high over them, over us. We were family.”

“Addiction is a disease.” Julie said, “Someone fighting it can’t always think straight.” She thought of Carrie’s mother. Julie grew up over there and when her mother was around things always seemed great. Their mothers had been friends along with Trever, but Carrie’s mother was always struggling and never stayed long. She came in and out of Carrie’s life the addiction winning out time and time again.

“Yeah and they know that, but it’s still hard when the person you love doesn’t always pick you back.” He told her, “I’m sure if we hadn’t died that night, they both would have been upset with her, but they would have forgiven her. I’m sure they do forgive her now, but the hurt is still there.”

* * *

Luke was sitting on the beach looking out at the ocean. It had been a long time since he thought of Charlotte. He hadn’t planned on falling in love with anyone back then. All he cared about was making music and sharing it with the world and somehow, she had found a way into his heart. It was slow her always being around until he couldn’t think of her not being there. Reggie always wanted to keep her close to keep an eye on her and enlisted the other bandmates to watch out for her. Honestly Luke had thought Bobby would end up with her, he seemed to have a thing for her always trying to ask her out, but she never seemed interested. He wasn’t even sure when he realized he had liked her. It was slow from not linking each other at all to friendship to more and soon Luke was going everywhere with her. They used to come out here all the time, she said the ocean always calmed her when she felt like her demons were going to win. It was strange how it was twenty-five years ago that they died, twenty-five years since he had sent her home. Yet it felt recent, it felt like only a few weeks ago that she broke his heart. He was upset with her for drinking and getting high, he had really thought he was important enough to her keep her off drugs, but he hadn’t been enough. It hurt that she chose that night, when it had meant so much to the band, after a year of being sober it had to be that night that she fell off the wagon.

“What happened to you Charlie?” he asked aloud he had tried all this time not to think about her because he was still angry at her. It was easier to be angry with her then to worry, but in all honesty he was worried. He knew what she battled he knew without Reggie and the band she would probably go back to her parents, back to that life. He feared what became of her and he feared what it would do to Reggie if the news wasn’t good. He would blame himself; he always did when it came to his sister.

* * *

Reggie couldn’t stop thinking of his sister and what happened to her, he wasn’t able to focus on his music and felt guilty for going as long as he had without really thinking of her. Yes, he was upset she got high on the night that was supposed to be his night, the bands night. That night he had been mad at her because he always put her first and on the one night, he wanted for himself she hadn’t been there for him. But he didn’t want to be angry with her not anymore, he had seen the struggle with his parents, and he knew she wanted to be good he couldn’t think there wouldn’t be slip ups from time to time. Now he just wanted to know what happened to her, but he was afraid to know he had a feeling on what losing him would do to her and losing Luke. That night she lost the people she considered her family.

So now he was sitting in the Livingroom with Ray. Ray always made him feel better. He was the type of father Reggie had always wanted. Reggie had grown up with parents that fought, parents that enjoyed drugs and while there was moment his mother was sober and a good mother his father had never been a good father. His father lost his temper his father even would hit him from time to time, but luckily it was only him he never hit Charlie. Ray wasn’t that type of guy, Ray was the guy that would never hurt his children. He had seen the way Ray supported Julie he often wondered what having a father like Ray would have done for Charlie. Just sitting in the living room with him made Reggie feel better even if Ray had no idea he was there. A knock at the door caused both of them to look up, Ray put down the article he was reading on the thing Reggie had learned was called and iPad. Reggie stayed on the couch while Ray answered the door.

“Hello Ray.” A female’s voice said once the door was open.

“Charlotte.” Ray said shocked, it had been a long time since he had seen Carrie’s mother. She had been one of Rose’s friends. A friend who always showed up from time to time when she was sober. Ray didn’t really know what had happened in her past all his late wife would tell him was she had demons that were slowly winning the battle. The last time she had run off Rose had been devastated, fearing that she would never see her friend again. She had been right.

“I came to pay my respects.” She said slowly, “I should have come sooner I just-” she looked down, “I-”

“Hey.” Luke said poofing in on the couch next to Reggie, “There you are. We were wondering what happened to you.”

“Oh you found him.” Alex said after he appeared sitting on the arm of the couch.

“It’s alright.” Ray told her, even if he wished she had come when he had called her before Rose died. Rose had wanted to know her friend was going to be alright. He stepped aside and let her in.

Charlotte took a deep breath and stepped inside, when she had heard Rose was sick, she wasn’t sober and used it as an excuse to lose herself even more. When she found out she died a letter arrived from Rose, a letter that convinced her to get sober.

“Who’s at the door?” Julie asked as she came walking into the room. She paused surprised to see Carrie’s mother. “Hi, Mrs. Wilson.”

“Hello Julie, it’s good to see you.” She smiled, I saw your performance last week I can’t believe that was you, your mother was right you have something special.” She remembered Rose telling her that when Julie sang, she got the same feeling she had when she heard Sunset Curve play. Her eyes moved to the shirt Julie was wearing. It had to be the one Reggie gave Rose with the band’s name on it. “Your shirt.” She said softly

Julie looked down, “It was moms.” she smiled, “I found it with some of her old things. There was a cd also.”

“There was?” Charlotte asked, “You have their demo?”

“You knew the band?” Julie asked.

Charlotte smiled softly, “I’ve heard them from time to time they were good.”

“We were better than good!” Luke’s voice called from the living room. Julie heard him coming over to them and looked up only to see Luke frozen in the doorway looking like he had seen a ghost.

Julie wanted to ask him if he was alright, but she couldn’t with her dad and Carrie’s mom standing in front of her.

“Come into the kitchen and let me get you something to drink.” Ray said

“Water please.” Charlotte said following him into the kitchen.

Once they disappeared, she stepped closer to Luke, “What’s wrong with you.”

Panic flashed across his face as he glanced into the living room, “How do you know that girl?” he asked.

“That’s Mrs. Wilson Carrie’s mom.” Julie said.

“Wilson?” he asked, “She married Bobby?” Bobby must of finally gotten what he wanted when the band died. He got Charlie he got all the fame from Luke’s song. He stepped right into Luke’s life.

“You know her?” she asked

“Know who?” Reggie asked walking up next to Luke Alex close behind him.

“She’s here.” Luke told him, “She looks good.” He looked over to Julie, “She’s good right?”

“If she’s here she sober.” Julie said, “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen here. Middle school maybe?”

“So, she isn’t always sober?” Luke asked.

“No.” Julie looked down, “Mom and her were friend that’s how I became friends with Carrie.”

“So, whose _she_?” Reggie asked

“Charlie.” Luke said softly. “Charlie is here.”

“Charlie?” Reggie asked

“Charlie?” Alex echoed

“Charlie.” Luke said again. “Our Charlie.”

“Thank you for stopping by.” Ray said as they came back into the room, “It’s good to see you again and I’m sure Rose would be so happy if she saw you now.”

Charlotte smiled as Ray spoke, “I miss her, but it’s good to see you guys doing so well.” She turned to Julie, “And you’re doing an amazing job your mother would be proud, I heard your performance the other night and your mom was right, I haven’t felt the way your music made me feel since I listened to my brother’s band.”

Julie looked over at her and then over at the boys. Now both Reggie and Luke looked like they had seen a ghost and Alex looked between the boys and then back at Charlie and when he looked at her it almost seemed like she was looking at him for a moment before she turned and left the house.

Ray closed the door behind Charlotte, “I hope this time she stays.” Ray told Julie.

“Me too.” She saw out of the corner of her eyes the ghost all poof away. So, she excused herself and hoped that they would be in the garage.

* * *

Reggie didn’t know what to do, he had finally seen his sister she looked good. He had been so worried about what happened to her and where she ended up, but Julie had said she wasn’t always sober that she struggled. That thought hit him like a wrecking ball. His sister had no one to help her no one to pick her up when she fell down after they all died. He collapsed onto the couch as Alex and Luke poofed in.

“Reg.” Alex sat down next to him, “Are you alright?”

“She looks good right?” Reggie asked, “Like she’s clean?” The boys nodded their head, “Julie said she isn’t always.”

“Julie also said she’s married to Bobby.” Luke sat down in the chair near the couch, “Bobby married her. He always wanted her you know.”

“Maybe it’s what they both needed.” Alex said, “They both lost a lot that night.” Luke glared over at Alex knowing that maybe Alex was right, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. It had been twenty-five years for Charlie and Bobby, but for him in hadn’t been that long ago. In his mind a few weeks ago he had thought. He and Charlie were always going to be together.

“I can’t believe she’s Carrie’s mother.” Alex said then smirked, “You know Charlie always loved to dance I can where Carrie gets it from because Bobby couldn’t dance to save his life.”

“There you guys are.” Julie said coming into the garage, “I was worried about you.” She glanced at Reggie.

Reggie looked up at her, “So, how has her life been?” his voice was soft.

“I mean from the times I’ve been around her she seemed fine. When she was around my mother and her were best friends, but every time she slipped up and ran off it crushed mom.” Julie took the other spot on the couch. “When I was old enough to wonder why she would come and go mom just said she had a lot of demons to fight.”

“She left her daughter?” Reggie asked thinking of their mother who always put drugs and alcohol in front of her children.

Julie frowned not knowing what to say for a moment, “She tries her best. She’s a good mother when she’s clean.”

“How long does that last?” Luke who had been silent asked.

Julie shrugged, “It varies, but from what I know it’s not usually very long. I just know how happy Trever and mom were when she was around and how crushed they were every time she left. Carrie and I were too young to really understand.” 

“So, we die, and Bobby gets my music and my girl?” Luke stood up and paced away from the chair then back over to them, “How is that fair he has my life.”

Julie tried to hide her hurt, but Alex saw it, “Luke.” He said, “They were the only two left they had each other like we have each other.”

* * *

Charlotte paused on the deck outside of Julie and Ray’s house. She had felt like she held herself together pretty well, but now she felt her hand tremble as she took in a shaky breath and tried to fight the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes. This house was always hard for her to come to that was why Rose always brought Julie to her and Trever’s house. This house, the garage here held so many memories ones she tried her best to run from. She had thought she could go inside, talk to Ray and Julie and she would remain strong, but it was almost as if she had heard Luke’s voice and then she could see her brother, Luke and Alex inside that house. It was as if her past continued to haunt her or she really was losing her mind.

She had thought she saw them standing in the doorway going to the living room, she had thought they were looking at her. It had seemed so real it was as if they were truly there just like Julie and Ray.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you guys think. Reviews always tend to inspire me to write more.


	3. Flashback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little look into the past, of how the band came to be and little bit showing Reggie and Charlotte's home life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not really sure where this is going I just write and let my fingers type what they want. Hopefully you guys enjoy this chapter as I enjoyed writing it. I also want everyone to know that the view points of some characters towards 'gay' isn't my views and just me trying to write the view point of someone from an unaccepting time as the flashback is from the early 90s

Reggie pulled his hood over his head as he got close to school, he wasn’t a fan of school he wasn’t one of the smart kids and often found himself struggling to keep up, but he wasn’t about to stay home with his parents. It didn’t matter if he passed or failed his parents didn’t care so he simply used school as a place to go to get out of the house and have a safe place to sleep. Now that he was starting high school it seemed the teachers noticed him sleeping in class and he often found himself in detention which lead to staying in school after hours which didn’t bother him. It didn’t matter to his parents they didn’t even notice that he wasn’t home on time. Luckily his sister wasn’t like him she was smart, and she had a big group of friends to hang out with. She walked in front of him laughing with her group. He was happy for her she had people outside of their family to be with he didn’t blame her from pulling away from him.

He pushed his hands into his pockets and hurried along he didn’t notice the boy in front of him until it was too late to fully dodge him. His shoulder bumped into the other boy before he could avoid him. “Sorry” he quickly muttered as he looked at the ground he had learned at a young age if you avoid eye contact and then you could avoid conflict.

“No worries.” The boy said turning to him. Reggie realized it was Luke Patterson. He was the type of guy that got a long with anyone he talked to, everyone liked him. Reggie gave him a half uneasy smile and kept heading into the building. He himself wasn’t the type of guy that really hung out with anyone especially someone as go lucky as Luke, in all honestly Reggie avoided most people unless it was his sister.

It was later in the day and Reggie was skipping class. He loved coming to the music room when he knew the music teacher was out to lunch. His parents would never buy him an instrument the one time he saved up his money to buy something his father ended up breaking it when he caught him playing it too loud while he had a hangover. Sneaking into the music room was his only way of getting to play. Music was what he lived for, music was all around him, there was something about playing the bass and singing that relaxed him. He enjoyed singing covers by himself and even played with his own music at times.

“Caught ya.” A voice said from the doorway causing Reggie to jump and quickly put the bass back. He looked up to see Luke grinning at him, “I didn’t know you could play.”

“I-” Reggie glanced at the bass, “I don’t really.”

“What I just heard said otherwise.” Luke walked in, “Are you in a band?”

“Band?” Reggie frowned, “No, why would I be in a band?”

“Perfect!” Luke seemed to bounce up and down like a little kid, “You see I’m trying to start up a band and we need someone to play bass.”

“No thanks.” Reggie said walking past Luke and pushing his hands back into his pocket, “I don’t know much I just play around with it.”

“That makes it even better.” Luke told him, “If you taught yourself that imagine what you could do with more practice.”

“I’m sure you can find someone better then me.” Reggie told him as he reached the doorway.

“No.” Luke said, “We’ve had so many people come to us and want to be part of the band but none of them could do what you did.”

“And what did I do?” Reggie asked

“It’s hard to explain,” Luke told him “It was a feeling.”

Reggie frowned at him, “A feeling?”

“That’s the only way I can explain it, when you played it’s like the music called out to me.” Luke shrugged, “Why don’t you just come by and play with us? Just once and if you don’t feel it then you don’t have to join.”

Reggie sighed, “I don’t have a bass.” He told him.

“Don’t worry I have one you can use.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper and grabbed a pen from one of the desks. “Here is my address.” He said after he wrote on the paper and handed it to Reggie. “Come after school.”

“Who’s in the band?” Reggie asked

“Me, Bobby and Alex.” Luke told him.

Reggie frowned; he didn’t have any issues with Bobby but from what he remembered Alex was one of those rich kids. “I don’t know.”

“Just give it a try please.” Luke stuck out his lip looking like a little kid begging

“Alright.” Reggie shrugged his shoulders, if anything it would keep him away from his parents longer.

After school Charlotte told Reggie she was going to a friend’s house so she wouldn’t be walking home with him which was fine. He glanced at the address Luke gave him and wondered how he was going to get there without a car.

“Reggie!” Luke called out, “Need a ride?”

“Uh.” Reggie noticed Luke had paused outside a car he had opened the back door to.

“Hey mom.” Luke called into the car, “Mind giving Reggie a ride to the house he’s going to play with us.”

“Sure.” Luke’s mother said looking out the car window and smiling at Reggie.

“Come on” Luke smiled and nodded his head to the car telling Reggie to come. Reggie paused for a only a moment but then a smile seemed to find a way to his lips. This boy seemed happy all the time and it seemed to be rubbing off on him.

“Coming.” Reggie said and a strange feeling washed over him as he walked over to Luke, a feeling he had never felt before unless he was with his sister. A feeling that said he was home.

Luke had been right it was like something he had never felt before. At first, he felt weird hanging out at Luke’s house with the other boys, he had some things in common with Bobby, but Alex was from the other side of the tracks. He came from a family that had money for anything they wanted, and he assumed both Alex’s parents were sober he wasn’t even sure if Alex would want someone like him around. He came from a family of drug addicts and people who went in and out of jail like it was some shopping mall. He worried they would have nothing in common and at first it was awkward; he didn’t say much but Luke seemed to do enough talking for him. At first the boys seemed confused at why Reggie was there it seemed Luke hadn’t told them he was going to play with them. He saw Alex frown when Luke said Reggie didn’t have much training but to give him a chance. When they finally started to play at first Reggie felt like he couldn’t do anything right he never played with other people before.

“Dude.” Luke said grinning over at him, “Relax, just play.” And so Reggie listened to him he took a deep breath and slowly he was able to work out how to play with them, what was supposed to be just a few cords turned to a song which turned to many which ended with Luke’s mother coming into the garage asking, “So whose staying for dinner?”

“Me!” Alex said quickly

“Me too!” Bobby added

Luke’s mom looked over to Reggie, “Oh.” Reggie glanced away it was a habit to not make eye contact with adults.

“She’s a great cook.” Alex said looked over to Reggie, “Stay.” Reggie looked up at Alex who was now smiling at him, “You won’t regret it I promise.”

“Ok.” Reggie agreed.

Soon it became normal to get a ride over to Luke’s house after school where Reggie would play with the band and Emily would invite them to stay for dinner. Sometimes Alex and Bobby stayed, but Reggie stayed every time she asked. It was nice to have home cooked meals he never had more then something thrown into a microwave. He couldn’t pinpoint when it was, but eventually it just became normal for all the guys to hang out together. For the first time since his sister had started eating lunch with her friend Reggie actually sat with people at lunch time. They would talk about songs they were working on and the future they wanted to have one day. Reggie for the first time actually was excited about his future, the music they made together was something that Reggie really believed in. From a young age he had always said he heard music all around him and for the first time hanging out with his band mates he felt like he was around people that understood him.

Late one night Reggie was asleep on his bed when he heard his door open which caused him to sit up quickly hoping it wasn’t one of his parents. He sighed in relief when he saw Charlotte.

“Hey.” He said to her stretching

“Hey.” She came over and sat down on his bed. “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“What?” he yawned

“So, you’ve been hanging out with those guys a lot these last few months.” She looked uncomfortable

“Luke, Alex, and Bobby?” Reggie asked

“Yeah them.”

“I haven’t really talked to you about it, but we’ve been working on making a band together. Luke has a bass he lets me use.”

Charlotte loved the fact her brother was making friends, that he was coming out of his shell. He had it rough. Their father always seemed to single him out whenever he got too drunk if Reggie was in sight. If it wasn’t verbal abuse it was physical, and it had affected the way Reggie acted outside of the family. Withdrawn, always looking down, always avoiding anyone who wasn’t her if he could. “Yeah Reggie you know the rumors.” She bit her lip she didn’t want people to think of her brother the way they thought of Alex.

“Rumors?” Reggie frowned

“About Alex.” She looked at him as if he could read her mind.

“No.” he tried thinking of rumors he had heard about Alex, and then he remembered listening to Charlotte and her friends talk. No matter how much any of them threw themselves at the blonde boy he never seemed interested.

“Everyone says he’s you know-” She looked at him again as if he could read her mind, this time he knew what she was trying to say.

Reggie shook his head, “He’s never said anything about that.”

“But people think it about him and if you hang out with him-” She shook her head, she had a feeling her father already seemed to have thoughts of Reggie leaning that way if their father found out he was hanging out with a gay kid he would really hurt Reggie.

“So.” Reggie frowned.

“So?” she asked, “You know what dad thinks of those people.”

“So.” Reggie said again.

“If he finds out about Alex.” She shook her head, “Reggie you know dad.”

Reggie shrugged, “Alex is my friend if he is or isn’t gay, I don’t care.” And it was true. Reggie didn’t care because Alex was nice to him. It didn’t matter what person Alex found attractive or didn’t.

“You shouldn’t hang out with him. Luke is fine honestly, he’s hot and he’s a great people person I’m sure he will be great for you. Bobby is alright a little weird but alright.”

Reggie frowned, “They are all my friends.” It was weird to think he had friends now, in the last few months the bond that had formed between him and the other guys was unreal it was as if they had been friends for life. “I really never thought you would be like this.”

“I don’t hate gay people, honestly I don’t care but I do care about you and what dad would do if he found out.” She told him.

“I’m not gay.” He sighed; he knew his family thought that he was, his father often said as much. “I Promise.”

Charlotte didn’t look like she believed him, she feared that if he was if he ever really did come out that their father would kill him. “I love you Reggie and I would love you no matter what, but dad-” she looked at her hands.

“It’s fine.” Reggie told his sister, “Everything is going to be fine.” Then he grinned, “Just wait the band and I are going to make it big and I’ll make enough money to buy a big house and we won’t have to worry about dad anymore.” He let himself fall back onto his bed

“That’s a nice dream” she told him laying down on the bed next to him. “But everyone thinks they can make it big Reg.”

“Trust me the music we are making is going to touch everyone’s souls one day.”

Charlotte looked over at her brother who was looking at the ceiling lost in his daydream and couldn’t help but smile even if she was worried what people would think if he kept hanging out with Alex. She had never seen Reggie like this in the last few months since he started hanging out with that group of boys, she could almost see the boy he used to be she could see the joy coming back to his life.

* * *

“Are you alright?” Reggie’s voice asked as he appeared next to Charlotte’s locker.

“Jeez, Reg don’t sneak up on me like that.” She glanced at him to see he was wearing the same cloths as last night with his leather jacket thrown over top of it. “You didn’t come home last night.”

Reggie shrugged, “I doubted dad calmed down.”

“He didn’t. Not really.” She said putting her books into her locker.

“He didn’t bother you, did he?” he asked feeling guilty he left her in the house when he left.

“Reg you know he doesn’t-” she sighed she didn’t know what to say. Her father wasn’t a good guy, he drank too much and did far too many drugs, but he never hit her. He singled out Reggie for that. Reggie wasn’t like most of the family, they were all the tough ride Harley type guys. The type of guys who people would see walking down the street and move out of their way. Reggie didn’t care for motorcycles or drugs like everyone else. Many times, she often heard her father talking about why Reggie never brought a girl home. Her parents thought that Reggie wasn’t into girls at all and that was why their father chose to ‘ _toughen’_ Reggie up. “If you just did what he wanted he wouldn’t hurt you.”

“And what is it he wants?” Reggie asked her.

“He wants you to be-”

“Be what?” Reggie asked, “A Drug addict by the time I’m seventeen? Join a gang like him and hit kids?” he shook his head, that wasn’t the type of life he wanted to live. After meeting joining the band a year ago he finally saw a path out of that life.

“He’s not in a gang.” Charlotte sighed, although she couldn’t know for sure. The type of people who were often at their house could make her wonder sometimes. “Just act more like the type of guy that he sees as a man’s man.”

“Man’s man?”

“You always hang out with Alex. Dad knows everyone knows.” She whispered, “What is he supposed to think?”

“Who cares what he thinks.” Reggie told her, he avoided being home as much as possible it seemed impossible to be in his house anymore without his father finding him and losing his temper.

“He hits you because he thinks your gay.” She snapped, “If you just showed him you weren’t then maybe he would stop.”

“What just bring a girl home throw her down on the couch and what? Show dad that I know what to do with a girl?” he shook his head, “I don’t care what they think as soon as I’m old enough I’m getting out of there you should too.”

“They are our parents.” Charlotte said, she didn’t want Reggie to know she actually enjoyed some of the wild nights their parents had at the house. They let her invite friends and allowed them all to drink. Reggie hardly ever saw because he wasn’t home, he didn’t see that mom and dad were actually fun if you let lose. “If you stop pretended to be better then everyone in our house then maybe you could see that they aren’t awful people.” Reggie took off his sunglasses to show her his eye. “Reg.” she said softly feeling the pain for him, their father had really done a number on him last night. His eye was black, and his lip was split.

“I’m never going to be what they want.” Reggie told her.

She frowned wondering if that was his way of admitting he truly was gay. “Reggie please” She didn’t want to know; she didn’t want her brother to come out and say it. If their father hit him this much now because he suspected Reggie was gay what would happen if Reggie said something?

Reggie just shook his head and walked away from his sister. She watched him go looking like a puppy who had just been kicked she saw the hurt on his face, the hurt she assumed was from him seeing how much she didn’t want him to tell her. She watched as he walked over to Alex and the other two boys in their group. The one called Luke reached up to carefully touch Reggie’s face, she could tell without even looking that he wanted to know what happened. Her eyes then locked with the other boy in the group Bobby, as soon as he realized she caught him looking at her he quickly looked away. Then Alex looked up at her and frowned causing her to glare back at him. It was his fault Reggie got hurt. If Reggie wasn’t friends with Alex, their father wouldn’t think that Reggie was gay. At least that is what she kept telling herself.

“I’m fine.” Reggie said as he leaned away from Luke’s hand, not because he worried about what his sister said but out of reflex. Luke’s hand fell away,

“I didn’t ask if you were fine, I asked what happened?” Luke said

“I fell.” Reggie said the usual excuse he gave, but all the boys knew what that was code for. Reggie had never told them flat out about his father, but they all had pretty good guesses. It was usually Luke’s house that he would show up late at climbing up to the window to sleep on the floor. Usually he was hurt, and Luke just knew to get him some pillows and blankets and not ask. By morning he was gone before Luke’s parents even knew he was there.

“Reggie.” Alex stared

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Reggie told them.

Luke and Alex looked at each other then back at Reggie wanting to say more, but didn’t they weren’t sure what to say, what to do.

“Oh.” Alex said changing the subject in hopes that he could try and make Reggie’s day a little better. “Mom and dad said the garage is ours if we want it.”

“Really?” Luke and Reggie said at the same time. Luke’s parents no longer seemed to support the band. They wanted Luke to focus on school and less on music. They told the boys they could no longer use the garage at Luke’s house in hopes they would give up music, “We can practice there?” Alex nodded his head and then glanced at Bobby who had just quickly turned around to face them. Alex looked to see where Bobby had been facing and frowned when he saw Reggie’s sister. She knew what happened to her brother and she never stopped it. Maybe it wasn’t fair to put the blame on her, but she was going down the same path as Reggie’s parents. Their house was the known party house and even if Reggie didn’t want to see it Alex knew she drank and had started drugs just like their parents. He looked back to the boys who all listened to Luke as he excitedly told them all about his plans for their band.

“I even thought of a name.” Luke was saying, “If you don’t like it, we don’t have to use it, but I was thinking Sunset Curve.”

* * *

Charlotte laughed with her friends as she brought a cup to her lips. There was something so freeing when she was drunk. She was sitting on the lap of one of the seniors at her school, Sean, she didn’t care who he really was just the fact he was able to get her a fake ID.

“So, who wants to go bar hopping?” he asked as he pulled the IDs out of his pocket for her and her friends.

“Let’s go.” She said reaching for them, but he pulled them back slightly and grinned at her. She rolled her eyes and kissed him knowing where he wanted this to go. While she was kissing him, she plucked the IDs from his hand. “If these works, maybe you’ll get more where that came from.” She told him as she broke away and stood up. Her friends giggled as they followed her out of the house.

The IDs worked just fine, but Charlotte knew she wouldn’t be going back to Sean he was only good for getting her the IDs she didn’t really want to sleep with him. Her mother had told her many times to use the fact she was a pretty girl to her advantage, and she knew how to do that well. They tried a few bars before they settled on the third it seemed the crowd was a younger crowd and they liked the fact that the sign out front said live music.

The bar was crowded so she didn’t see the band playing, but the music was amazing, she danced with her friends to every song the band played. She loved when she was at this point, definitely buzzed closer to drunk feeling free and letting herself go to the music. She didn’t care about anything else going on around her, she didn’t need to think of her home life or her brother getting hit by their father or how she could feel him drifting away from her.

When the music finally stopped as the band took a break, she found herself heading back to the bar to get a drink she was surprised to see a lot of girls were surrounding someone at the bar. She rolled her eyes, she just wanted to get a drink and it seemed she was to slow getting off the dance floor. Through the crowd she saw a grin she knew from one of the boys her brother hung out with Luke, the cute one. Girls seemed to be all over him as he tried to make his way to the bar he didn’t seem like it bothered him much. Next she saw Bobby and he just seemed surprised from the attention and then she saw Alex, the boy who she blamed for Reggie getting hurt. 

“Dibs on the drummer.” Alexis one of her friends said next to her.

“Drummer?” She asked

“The blonde boy, you’re looking right at him.” Alexis

“You aren’t his type.” Charlotte told her smirking.

“How would you know?”

“We go to school with him, that’s the gay kid.” She told her.

“Oh my god.” Alexis was shocked, “I didn’t even recognize him, who knew he was in a band. Those looks are wasted on him, that is not fair.”

Charlotte heard him before she saw him, Alex had gotten out of the crowd of girls and was now with Reggie.

“That was amazing!” Reggie was saying to Alex, “I think they liked us!”

“I think they loved us.” Alex grinned

“And all the girls, I couldn’t even get to the bathroom!” Reggie grinned

“Too many girls.” Alex said wrinkling his nose

“Never to many.” Reggie laughed, “I’ve gotten more numbers tonight then in my whole life.”

“ahhh guys!” Luke came flying over to them, “That was amazing!” he had mostly ditched the pack of girls that were around him.

Charlotte watched her brother laugh and talk with his friends she was happy to see his smile. It had been so long since she had really seen her brother smile and look so happy. You could still see the split in his lip and the slight shadow from where their father had hit him, but only if you were close to him.

She had always known he liked music but never gotten to really hear him play their parents got mad if they ever heard him. The most she ever heard was when he sang her to sleep.

“Your brother is hot.” Another one of her friends said, “Are you going to introduce us?”

“You’ve never been interested in Reggie before.” Charlotte frowned, “Why now?”

“He’s voice is amazing!” her friend Claire giggled, “Please Char please!”

“Fine.” She said as she moved through the crowed stumbling slightly due to the amount she had already consumed.

“Reggie.” She said throwing herself at her brother and her arms around him into a hug.

“Jeez.” He said surprised as he caught her stumbling slightly into Alex who made sure they didn’t fall over catching the both of them. “Charlie? What are you doing here?”

“Having fun.” She said her words slurring as she stood up and swayed slightly. “My friends wanted to meet you.” She glanced over at Alexis and Claire “Girls this is Reggie my brother.”

Reggie gave a half smile to them he knew who they were, but then spoke to his sister, “How much did you have to drink tonight?”

“Not a lot sheesh don’t be a buzz kill.” She told him. “We just wanted to say your band was great.”

“You like to dance, don’t you?” Alex asked smiling at her, he had seen her in the crowd, while he could tell she definitely was drunk he could also see she could really move.

“Uh yeah.” She didn’t like talking to Alex she didn’t like that in her mind he was the reason that Reggie got hit so much. He seemed like a nice enough guy, but because Reggie was his friend their father assumed Reggie was the same. “It’s your fault.” She found herself saying unable to hold in her words. When she drank her filter was gone.

“My fault you dance?” Alex asked glancing at Reggie

“No.” she told him, “Your fault he gets hurt.”

“Charlie.” Reggie said turning a little white, “Let’s get you home.”

“What?” Alex asked looking between the twins.

“Don’t listen to her Alex, she’s drunk.” Reggie told him, “I’m just going to take her home. You guys enjoy tonight.”

“No.” She frowned, “He has to know, he has to know that it’s all his fault.”

“No, it’s not.” Reggie told her, “It has nothing to do with him.”

“He’s gay.” She said loudly which caused Luke to look over and frown at her. “And because your friends with him dad thinks you are too. That’s why he does it you know!” she hated the fact their father hurt him, but if only Reggie showed everyone, he wasn’t gay if he stopped hanging out with Alex.

Alex looked at Reggie pain in his eyes, “I-I-” he didn’t know what to say, he had always assumed Reggie’s father hit him but never would have guessed it was because they were friends. Alex’s eyes darted from Reggie to his sister.

“No Alex.” Reggie shook his head, “She doesn’t know what she’s talking about. My father is just-” he paused, “It’s not you.”

“Yes, it is!” Charlotte told him it was what she always told herself, “It is and you know it, he doesn’t want a gay son.”

“I’m not gay!” Reggie sighed angerly, “Even if I was there is nothing wrong with it.” he shook his head. Then looked at Alex who still looked like he was going to really blame himself. “Alex.” He said softly, he knew Alex well enough to know his friend would take his sister’s words to heart, “He just uses it as an excuse.” He never talked about what his dad did but couldn’t let Alex think it was because of him. “It’s not because we are friends. It’s been going on far longer then before I met you”

“It is.” Charlotte butted in. “it got so much worse since you’ve known him.”

“Shut up.” Reggie snapped at her which caused her to shut her mouth, he never lost his temper with her, she had never heard him raise his voice to her. “We’re leaving now.” She wanted to argue with him, but the anger on her brother’s face right now was new to her she had never seen it directed at her before, so she just nodded her head.

* * *

Charlotte groaned as she opened her eyes everything seemed too bright around her. She turned her head to see a cup of water and some pain meds sitting next to her bed. That meant Reggie had been here he was the only one that cared enough to do something like that. She heard voices out in the living room, so she quickly took the pills and grabbed the cup of water. She walked slowly to the door as the room felt like it was spinning. When she looked into the living room, she saw her brother with a guitar on his lap softly strumming it and smiling as he was talking to someone. She stepped outside of her room to see it was one of her friends, Claire who had gone out with her last night. She watched as her friend laughed and placed her hand on Reggie’s arm.

“So, you write music?” she asked

“Yeah, well all of us do but Luke is the master mind.” Reggie was telling her

“Could you play something for me?” Claire asked.

“Uh.” Reggie glanced down at the guitar, “I don’t usually play guitar I was just bored, I’m usually with the bass.”

“You could just sing.”

Reggie blushed, “I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“We could do something together.” Claire leaned closer to him

“Sing together?” Reggie asked.

Claire smiled at him and moved even closer; she brought her lips to his. Charlotte froze she knew Claire had said she liked Reggie’s voice last night but before last night her friend had never shown any interest in Reggie. She also had never thought she would walk in on Reggie kissing a girl. She like her parents had begun to think that Reggie wasn’t even into girls simply because he never seemed to show much interest in them.

Reggie was surprised to say the least, but the kiss wasn’t unwelcome he kissed her back and leaned into her a little more putting the guitar aside.

Charlotte quickly coughed when she saw her brother’s hands moving towards her friend which caused Reggie to pull back from the girl and look up at her. Surprise showed on his face until he fully took her in and then he frowned.

“You’re awake.” He said standing up

“Did I interrupt anything?” she asked as she smiled, what she had just seen proved her brother wasn’t gay, if he started dating Claire and their father saw then maybe he wouldn’t hurt Reggie anymore.

“We were just talking about music.” Claire told her, “And making up a little music of our own.” Reggie turned bright red as he glanced at Claire.

“I, uh.” He was at a loss for words, but then turned back to his sister. “We need to talk.” He didn’t look happy.

“About what?”

“What you said last night?” he told her, “What you said to Alex.”

“Reg, I drank way too much last night.” She said waving her hand as if to erase her actions. “I don’t remember what I said.”

“You told him.” Reggie said moving forward causing Charlotte to frown she hardly ever saw her brother mad let alone his anger directed towards her.

“Told him what?”

Reggie glanced at Claire for a moment and then to his sister, “About dad, you said everything was Alex’s fault.”

“Sorry.” Charlotte told him, she knew when she drank her filter was gone, she said what was on her mind and didn’t worry how it hurt others.

“I only stayed until you woke up to make sure you were ok.” Reggie pulled his leather jacket on, “Mom and dad stayed out last night.” He added which was another reason he stayed she wasn’t sure he would have if they had been home. He turned to Claire, “I need to get to practice.”

“Do you need a ride?” she asked.

“No-” he told her, “The bus station isn’t far I just didn’t want to uh-”

“Kiss and run?” Claire smiled, “I’ll forgive you if you let me give you a ride to practice.”

Charlotte couldn’t believe how her friend was being with Reggie and by the looks of it Reggie seemed confused as well.

“Uh-sure.” Reggie told her then looked back at his sister, “I have to make sure Alex is ok.”

Charlotte rolled her eyes, “He shouldn’t take my words to seriously everyone knows when I’m drunk, I say things I shouldn’t”

“No.” Reggie told her, “Not everyone knows that, you shouldn’t even know what you’re sixteen you shouldn’t be getting drunk like that.”

“Reg everyone our age gets drunk.” Charlotte told her.

“I don’t.” he told her. “You shouldn’t either you don’t want to end up like our parents.”

Charlotte rolled her eyes, “I’m not going to end up like them but I’m not going to run away from fun either.”

“Be careful Charlie you are heading down a slippery slope and I don’t know how much longer I can keep pulling you back up.”

Now she was mad, “You always act like you are better than us, this whole family”

“I’m going to start the car.” Claire said quickly leaving the house sensing this was a family matter.

“I just want more out of life.” Reggie told her, “for me and also for you.”

Charlotte glared at him, “Well don’t worry about me anymore I’m happy with where I am.”

The anger seemed to leave her brother and he just looked sad, no disappointed in her and that hurt worse than seeing his anger. “Ok.” He turned and left the house leaving her standing in the doorway of her room. Even though he seemed to agree with her she didn’t feel like she had won. 

* * *

Reggie knew what his family thought of him, he knew they thought he didn’t like girls, but that wasn’t true. He defiantly like girls he just never wanted to bring anyone home. He had been playing with the band for over a year now and they had started playing gigs a few months ago. Being in a band and playing gigs made it easy to meet girls. He wasn’t great at talking to girls at first but having Luke as a wing man made it easier. While Reggie wasn’t like Luke always knowing what to say and how to flirt, he also wasn’t bad. It seemed to come easier to him then he had thought. He spent most of his life trying to be invisible and was surprised at how much he liked being seen now. He wasn’t surprised when Claire pulled her car off the main road and drove to the spot most people went to when they were alone. While he knew he wanted to get to Alex and make sure he was alright after what Charlotte had said last night, he also couldn’t deny the fact he was a sixteen-year-old boy who was alone with a very attractive girl. She put the car and park and looked over at him then she glanced at the back seat of the car with a smile on her face.

* * *

An hour later Claire dropped Reggie off at Alex’s house. “Call me.” She told him as she pulled away. Reggie nodded and then headed towards the garage. Alex’s parents were fine with them using the garage, but they all knew it was because they seemed uncomfortable around Alex now. They had remodeled the garage to have a bathroom and shower and acted like it was a gift giving him his own space, but in reality, all the boys knew. They knew his parents didn’t accept who Alex really was. Reggie didn’t bother knocking as the door was already open, he was surprised to see Luke and Bobby weren’t there, yet which was surprising since he was late as it was after stopping with Claire. Alex was laying on the couch just looking at the ceiling. He turned his head when he heard Reggie and when he saw him, he quickly sat up.

“Reggie.” He said and Reggie could see in Alex’s eyes that he believed every word that Charlie had said last night. “Is it true?”

“No.” Reggie said as he went and sat down in the chair near the couch, “I mean you all know my dad isn’t the best.”

Alex looked down at his hands, “We always guessed.” He thought of all the times Reggie came in with bruises or the times Reggie winced when lifting up his bass. “You can talk to us.” Alex said softly, “If you want to that. is.”

Reggie glanced away and looked at the wall without saying anything, “There isn’t must to say, my dad just isn’t a good guy.”

“But is it because-”

“No.” Reggie told him, “This has been going on my whole life, I’m just not like them. I’m different.” He smiled at Alex, “It has nothing to do with us being friends. It’s just the current excuse.” Reggie’s eyes met Alex’s, “Being your friend, being in this band is the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Alex smiled at his friend, “Yeah me too.”

* * *

Claire let herself into Charlotte’s house and went to her friends’ room. She often came here to party with Charlotte. She had seen Reggie many times, even before the boy had joined the band. She had never thought much of him he always wore a hoodie, and had it pulled up around his head. He seemed happy to fade into the background and never once left a lasting impression on her. If anything, he had seemed kind of weird always walking with them to school but hanging back slightly never speaking up. For a long time she wondered why he was so withdrawn while Charlotte was so outspoken, but then she had been at the house one day when Charlotte’s father was drunk and had seen the way he singled out Reggie when he thought the boy looked at him the wrong way. Claire was scared that night when Charlotte’s father started yelling and throwing things, but Reggie had quickly stepped between him and the girls and almost pushed them into Charlotte’s room. They never saw him hit Reggie but both girls had heard it. When morning came around the girls, who had stayed in Charlotte’s room the rest of the night after that, got ready for school. Reggie came out of his room with his hoodie over his head and didn’t talk to either of them, he didn’t make eye contact with anyone or speak when Charlotte tried to talk to him. He simply leaned away from her hand and fell back letting the girls walk ahead of him to school. That was when she stopped asking Charlotte why her brother was so weird. That night she actually started to form a small crush on him. She came from a similar family parents that drank and yelled the only difference was her parents were rich. She had never had someone protect her the way Reggie had seemed to push her and Charlotte from the room, but she knew nothing would come of her crush. Reggie never talked to anyone he seemed resigned to the idea of always hiding in the shadows. She also listened to Charlotte’s worries that Reggie was gay and if that was true their father would kill him. Because Claire never saw Reggie show interest in anyone, she often found herself wondering if maybe just maybe he really was gay.

The change in Reggie was slow after he became friends with Luke, Alex, and Bobby. Claire had noticed the way Luke seemed to find Reggie and then never let go. Luke seemed to bring a light into Reggie’s life. Claire hadn’t known it was music at the time and only assumed it was just because Luke pulled Reggie into a group of friends. She watched as Reggie started to smile more, she heard his laugh at lunch when he was with his friends. In the year he had befriended the other boys she watched the dark shadows that seemed to follow Reggie move away. Then last night she had seen him up on stage, playing and singing. He had looked so confident he had looked so happy. When she overheard his remark to Alex about their _‘never being to many girls.’_ He knew she had to figure out if she had a chance with him. She knew what guys thought of her, she was sixteen and already seemed to be known as the _‘easy girl’_ especially when she was drinking. In all honesty she had never been with a guy when she was sober, that is until this morning when she parked her car with Reggie. She had been surprised when he kissed her back on the couch and she had been surprised when he actually moved into the back seat of her car. She was even more surprised that he knew what he was doing. She had assumed because of how shy he had been only a year ago perhaps he wouldn’t have known what to do, but he had. For the first time with any guy she actually did want him to call her and she was actually worried that maybe he wouldn’t, for the first time she wasn’t confident she could really get the guy she wanted.

“What took you so long?” Charlotte asked she had showered and cleaned herself up from last night.

Claire grinned and let herself fall back onto her friend’s bed, “Your brother so isn’t gay.”

“What?” then Charlotte wrinkled her nose, “I’m afraid to ask how you know that.”

Claire grinned at her, “Well you were worried he was gay, so I tested him.”

Charlotte just looked at her friend unsure what to say, she had seen them kiss sure, but she had almost thought Claire had just surprised her brother. “tested?”

“If he pushed me away, I would think he was more interested in Alex, but he defiantly didn’t push me away and he knew exactly what he was do-”

“Oh god I don’t want to know!” Charlotte brought her hands to her ears

Claire laughed, “Well just know he so isn’t gay you can rest easy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to keep this story as PG as I can, but there will be some implied areas as you guys can see. Let me know if you guys like the backstory or want me to so less on the 90s and more of 2020 time. I plan on having this story have both flashbacks and present time chapters.


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